Automated out-of-office message

Filed under: General - Mark @ 10:12 am


Well people, I’m away! I don’t know where I am, but I’m certainly not in Australia. If you want to kinda know maybe where I am then:

Fri 28th Jan: Sydney (2215) -> Singapore -> London (29Th 1035) (Total duration: 23:20)

Thu 12th Feb: Londong (0705) -> Frankfurt (0955) (Total Duration: 1:40)

Tue 22nd Feb: Geneva (1705) -> London (1755) (Total Duration: 1:50) -> London (2145) -> Sydney (24th 0625) (Total Duration: 21:40)

They’re the major milestones, but there’s a lot of other smaller trips, like driving all around England (stonehenge, oxford etc), from Frankfurt to Amsterdam, Amsterdam to Geneva etc. I doubt I’ll blog but you never know your luck!

Feel free to browse the archives while I’m away if you’ve missed any of my previous posts!

Add Comment (6) | 28/1/2005



All prepared

Filed under: General - Mark @ 2:54 pm


Well Im about $200 poorer (again) but I got all the rest of the things I need for my trip (inc. socks, PJs, power adapters etc). Now just to pack it all when it comes out of the wash.

Scary stuff.

Imma gunna miss you Angela! Im gunna find something uber-special to bring back for you!

Oh, and photo’s from yesterday’s bbq are online!

Add Comment (1) | 27/1/2005



It’s great to be Aussie!

Filed under: General - Mark @ 8:21 am


Happy Australia Day!!

Proud to be aussie

On an annoying note, WE still have to work! Cisco get their 4th July holiday off but we don’t get our Australia Day.

On an even sader note, I have a lot of family out at Hamilton in western Victoria, right. Well, we found out yesterday at work that someone from Hamilton Hospital called Cisco for support (during the US shift, about 6am our time) because one of their communication systems has failed. The person that got the call refused to provide support to the hospital, and a patient died. Seriously not cool. I wanna know who it was and beat the shit outta them, fucking idiots. What’s even worse is that most of my extended family is out there so I swear it better not have been my relation. I doubt it, but it better not have been.

Add Comment (1) | 26/1/2005



Odd… very odd

Filed under: General - Mark @ 9:25 am


Wanan hear about probably the longest ane one of the most strangest dreams I’ve ever had? Well like it or not Im gunna tell you:

It started pretty normally as a date with Ange and I, but then we met this really freaky religious dude who was kinda like a cross between christian and wicca. He was also a very bad person. I dont know why, but he just was. The kind of person who the world would be better off without.

So anyway somehow me him and ange end up in a kind of like theatre stage cross worskshop and there’s all these sharp instruments and tools around (as there are in workshops) – maybe it was a theatre undergoing renovations? I dunno. Anyway there we got into a fight with him, bit of biffo, scuffling, and he gets me into a headlock from behind. So I’m crouched over, he’s behind me holding me in a headlock and then Ange picks up an electric drill and drills straight into his brain 😐 Very effective way of k illing someone I guess.

So anyway he’s dead in a massive pile of blood and brains and I’m like “Shit, do we call the police” and Ange is “Nobody saw us here, lets just take his money so it looks like a robbery and get out of here” so I did. He only had monopoly money though (and it was all $5 notes). We went into Woolworths which was accross the road and waited for someone to find him and call the police. We’d bought Mars Bars and were chatting with the guy behind the counter about the murder (He knew about it even though the police hadnt arrived yet – in fact he brought it up) and he was like “I hear he got stabbed in the ear or something, they had to stitch the side of his face up” and I was going to say somethign like “Its a bit hard to stitch them up when we’ve drilled into the side of their head” but that woulda given us away.

So we nicked off out the side entrance of the woolworths to the back of the theatre thing, and there was the guy being loaded into a bodybag. But after we’d walked past, OMFG HE WASNT DEAD! Just severely incapacitated. So we pissed off to Angela’s place (except she lived in Hornsby in a brand new house with a view of the bush) and there was two croonies of the dead-but-not-really-dead guy asking Angela’s parents if they had a theatre (which they did) and then they gave them the full address of it, and the croonies asked them to stop by there later cos they wanted to show them something (in other words they wanted to butcher her whole family and for ironys sake do it in a theatre). So I was all “We HAVE to tell your parents what happend! WE HAVE TO!” but Ange didnt want to, so I go “Im making an executive decision! IM TELLING YOUR PARENTS WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT FOR THEIR OWN SAFETY”.

So we sat down with her parents and the story goes something like “You know that murder that’s been on the news? Well… umm… not only did Angela and I witness the murder… but we also partook in it. In fact we’re the ones that did it” and the look on their faces was of absolute horror. Then we told them that the two guys that were there were there to kill us and the rest of our families so we all piss-bolted away to hide (as you do).

Anyway thats when I woke up, but damn it seemed so real and I was absolutally petrified when I woke up. lol I sound like such a baby.

So on other notes, last month we (as a family) spent 451 hours on the internet and downloaded 8078.29 MB. This month we’ve spent 370 hoursand downloaded 12503.07 MB. Thats more downloads in less time. Mind you, my brother knocked over 5247 MB in the last 24 hours. Nuts. Now consider that there’s only about 720 hours in one month. That means that our internet spends 50% of the time ticking over. Crazy banana, that’s a lot of internet. Especially considering I spend about 30 – 60 mins on the internet before I go to work (like now), then 6 hours on it at work (still working, but yeah), then another hour or two on it when I get home. I wonder if that’s considered an addiction.

I fly out on Friday. You gunna miss me? You better 😛

Add Comment (1) | 25/1/2005



Gone again

Filed under: General - Mark @ 9:18 pm


I was gunna write some kinda story in here but I’ve totally forgotten what it is. So I won’t.

Add Comment (1) | 24/1/2005



New layout

Filed under: General - Mark @ 9:10 pm


Yes, it’s a new layout! In case you’re either a first time visitor or blind Im sure you have already noticed. I made it myself. It needs a few minor adjustments here and here but I’m impatient so I couldn’t be bothered implementing them right now, I’ve done enough work on it today.

And you know what this mean?! It means that I FINALLY figured WP’s codes out! YAY!

Add Comment (3) | 23/1/2005



Cruel Intentions

Filed under: General - Mark @ 2:46 pm


Want to waste one hour and sixteen minutes of your life? Watch Cruel Intentions 3. The first was a classic (well actually a remake of a french film), second sucked but at least had a lesbian shower scene, third one was just…. pathetic. But I knew it was going to be pathetic when I hired it so I guess it was of my own doing.



Gravatars again

Filed under: General - Mark @ 11:28 am


Well I did a very poor hack to get the gravatars installed.

To set up a gravatar for your own comments, pop over to Gravatar’s Signup Page and sign up! Then whenever you enter your email address for a comment on a gravatar enabled page, it displays your gravatar next to your comment. Useless, but kinda cool.

E.g. see this page.

Add Comment (0) | 22/1/2005




Filed under: General - Mark @ 10:27 am


Nadine brought Gravatars to my attention. They let you have a funky noodle logo next to the comments you leave. Not that I ever receive many comments, but I’m gunna install it anyway. Just gotta figure out how. Doesn’t look hard but I can’t be bothered at the moment. Maybe while I’m at work, ey?

My back is all sunburnt, courtesty of The Sun mixed with The Pool yesterday. In fact I think thts the longest I’ve spent at a pool in about 5 years. Water isn’t really my thing. Ange likes the water, but if she didn’t take me to the pool I doubt I’d ever go. I’ve been twice by myself in the entire 2 years we’ve lived here, with a 25m pool at our disposal whenever we want for free.

Had two trips to the airport yesterday (once for mum and dad and once for jess and jayme – both of who were going to Brisbane, but 12 hours apart), and gotta go again tomorrow to pick Mum and Dad up. Baahhh.

Did I mention that I moved desk at work? I don’t remember. Well I moved desk into the Service Relations area. I’ll miss Brendan and Jesse but I won’t miss Russle. At all. But hey, I’ll live.

I Googled for my name (in “”s, like “Joe Brown”), limiting results to Pages from Australia and I myself didnt turn up till page 7, and it was some profile that I made for a forum, then once on Page 8 (same forum), Page 11 for an old website I ran years ago (not modified since 2000), discovered that I’m the mayor of a fairly large Australian town, and of course let’s not forget a free’d hostage (yeah I was all over the news a few years ago) – not not until page 16! And then nothing in the other 8 pages 🙁



Zoom broom

Filed under: General - Mark @ 9:11 am


First trip to the airport down, one more to go at about 6 tonight 🙂

Add Comment (0) | 21/1/2005



xBan update

Filed under: General - Mark @ 9:40 pm


Ok I streamlined SOME of the code (not much though), and added a ‘review’ feature where you can now see who’s been banned, as well as the date they hit.

Oh and I totally forgot to actually turn the stupid thing ON for my site (and Ange’s and Mandy’s. Oops), so anyway it’s on now (and already blocking people, I have those stupid spambots banned as well as Bec now, she already hit me twice since turning it on).

Updated the URLs in the previous post, but anyway here they are again:

xBan for WP | xBan for b2

Add Comment (0) | 20/1/2005



Money must be funny

Filed under: General - Mark @ 7:14 pm


*sigh* Broke again… paid all my bills today.

I got the money for Europe and not a cent more.




Filed under: General - Mark @ 9:18 am


Hehe I kinda fucked up the xBan script (see previous post), and I think it may have been banning everyone… oops! I removed it from this page for the moment (Don’t stress the version below still works, I just made some “modifications” to my own one).

Anyways at work someone up high(er than em) is demanding that heads roll over something that happened and they’re trying to pin it on me, when in fact I was the one that fixed the problem, not caused it. Stoopid managers.

Ange got her braces off yesterday.

What else… umm…. nothing k thx bye.



xBan Hostname Banning Script

Filed under: General - Mark @ 10:35 pm


Ok, hostname banning script is FINISHED! I want to kind of make it public so I’ll give it a dedicated page soon. It’s powerful enough, runs on SQL and integrates with the WP and B2 databases that already exist (no need to create more databases and stuff). Has a password protected GUI that you can use to customise everything and an automated installation script. All you have to do is insert a line in your B2/WP code. I’ve made a WP and B2 version of them, and they can be downloaded here:

Download xBan for WordPress
Download xBan for B2

Oh, and thanks to Phil’s genious, it’s called xBan (as in Ex-Girlfriend/Boyfriend Banner, xBan, get it? Eh). I thought it was a sufficently nerdy name. Anyway feel free to grab it. I haven’t put any copyright notices in it or anything so I guess you can rip away. Anyway the code is that fucking messy at the moment you’ll have real fun following it.

Add Comment (0) | 18/1/2005



The ususal suspects

Filed under: General - Mark @ 12:22 pm


Went out last night to a Jo’s place with a few of the guys from church. We watched The Usual Suspects. It was a pretty good movie, albeit I found it slightly predictable. *Warning, spoilers*

For starters, Verbal has a limp. Why does he have a limp? We don’t know. Oh, but we do know. We know because Verbal is the bad guy. It’s obvious from about 30 minutes in. For the simple reason that if he wasn’t a bad guy he wouldn’t have a limp. Movie makers are not going to give someone a limp unless it plays a MAJOR role in the film. Sure, it comes in handy at the end of the movie in the shootout as the only one who survives, but there were other ways of dealing with that.

On that same not, the simple fact that he survived?! Yeah, like that was an ‘accident’. If you knew what to look for you knew he was the bad guy before you even KNEW there was a bad guy.

Mind you, all these things didn’t stop it from being incredibly suspensful and a great movie, even if you do know whats going to happen!

Add Comment (0) | 17/1/2005


Next Page »